i was reading an article yesterday in the central cal parent magazine about “is your child spoiled?” and the list of signs to look for were pretty much not at all maeven…well there are times, but they consistently said in the article that its normal from time to time to have some of these behaviors, but its the pattern of behavior to be looking for and i can honestly say she doesn’t have the pattern…but just to be certain, i asked her the question they said to ask…. “what are you thankful for?” because they said spoiled kids would probably have a hard time answering this…
so i asked maeven (age 6, spunky little homeschooled girl, artist, scientist, gymnast, yoga-guru and big sister extraordinaire) the question and you know what she said? without even a millisecond of hesitation (no exaggeration! and i don’t recall ever having asked her this question before!) she launched into a list of things such as “i’m thankful for having food, because some people don’t have enough food to eat…and i’m thankful for having a home, because some people are homeless and don’t have a home to live in…and i’m thankful having friends, because some people are mean and they don’t have any friends”… (i’ve talked to her many many times about mean people are mean because they are hurting and unhappy, and maybe they just need someone to love them and be friends with them and that would help them to be happy and not mean)…and on and on and on! she continued on, covering all the biggies and some of the littles…she’s thankful for money, family, etc etc etc….she really gets it! i was so proud i was about to burst! my little girl is not only not spoiled, she’s really grateful!!! how cool is that???
just when you need to get some sort of affirmation that you’re parenting well, something like this happens. its enough to bring tears to your eyes! and after having a couple days with her being little snotty mouth a few times too! still, my little girl is thankful and is appreciative for the important things! oh man, this mama is PROUD!!!
Just two days ago I told a visiting friend that I didnt like the idea of “spoiled”–I didn’t like the term.
I’ll interrupt an adult to comment on the concept. He wasn’t a parent and wasn’t complaining about my kids at all. He was talking about being spoiled as a kid because his mom would make him lumpy Malt-o-Meal, and make another pot smooth for his brother.
I suggested he was catered to, loved, accommodated. He felt way better right then!
I have an article about that idea of “spoiled” here: http://sandradodd.com/spoiled